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10 Hilarious Life Lessons We’ve All Learned from “Hitch”


Known to many as the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, Will Smith became America’s favorite love expert starring in the 2005 romantic comedy Hitch. Smith plays professional dating consultant Alex “Hitch” Hitchens, a man hired to help genuine male clients get into romantic relationships with the women of their dreams. Art often imitates life as some of the funniest lessons we’ve learned in love throughout the years have come from what we witnessed in our favorite films. Today, we’re going to discuss some of the film’s funny life lessons that everyone can learn from as We Own The Laughs presents 10 Hilarious Life Lessons We’ve All Learned from Hitch.

This list will focus on hilarious moments from the film that you can use as basic life principles whether you’re trying to live life, love life, or just discover moments that will take your breath away.

Now let’s get started with our list……

10. With no game, there is no girl:

Hitch has many different theories when it comes to gaining attention from the opposite sex. The theory that stands out most is “With no game, there is no girl.” We’ve all been bored scrolling through social media and came across a photo of a guy who looked uglier than “The Fiend” Bray Wyatt living their best life with a woman that looks better than three Beyonces in lingerie, causing us all to scratch our heads and say “How in the f*ck did that happen?”

According to Urban Dictionary, GAME is when a person confidently uses their attributes, characteristics, and overall personality to win the affection of the woman you want. So, it doesn’t matter if you’ve been mistaken for Michael B. Jordan in Starbucks or mistaken for Beetlejuice at Applebee’s, you will never be able to keep the woman you desire without the right amount of communication skills. Money might catch her eye, looks might have her come your way, but if you don’t have the wordplay to keep her attention, she’ll be gone faster than yesterday.

9. No one is ever that into their career right now:

At the beginning of the film, Hitch explains the various excuses that women use to turn down men. If they think he’s a nice guy, but not their type, they will simply reply with “I’m really into my career right now.”

Building a career of any kind can be very time-consuming, but even with a hectic work schedule, love is never too far from a woman’s mind. Hell, even a busy New York City lawyer manages to find time to bust some slobs with Scuba Steve. The average woman has 85% of their day already accounted for before they wake up in the morning. The other 15% is left open to pursuing other personal interests that may possibly come their way. So, if a woman gives you 15% of her day, she said yes when she could’ve said no and the only thing you need to do is not mess it up.

*Hilarious Side Note: No matter if he runs a fortune 500 company or is 15 min late to a job interview at Burger King, every man from the age of 15 to 3 mins past the end of time plans most of their day around the possibility of sex. So if a man tells you he’s really into his career right now, he thinks you’re extremely not his type.

8. Never be afraid to “Swing For The Fences”:

It wouldn’t be a classic romantic comedy without an outrageous attempt at love. After hearing Albert Brennaman’s sentimental plea in regards to dating the woman of his dreams, Allegra Cole, Hitch agrees to take Albert under his wing as a client. This is due in large part because he could appreciate the way Brennaman swang for the fences when it comes to love.

Women are courted by every type of man all day every day, so if you want to impress the woman of your dreams or keep the woman within your life, you’ll have to do two things and that’s “Shock & Awe”. Love is a gamble and if you want to win big, you’re going to have to bet big. Now don’t get us wrong, there will be times where you lay your heart on the line and lose from time to time. But, all it takes is one big win for you to be set with your special someone for the rest of your life.

7. No one is ever buying lingerie for their mother:

Used as a running gag in the film, Eva Mendes’ character Sara Melas voices her concerns in regards to the true intentions of Vance Munson, a man her best friend Casey meets while he claims to be lingerie shopping for his mother. Hitch also questions those intentions when Vance attempts to purchase his services, which he forcefully declines. Eventually, Casey realizes that Vance is a complete liar, unfortunately, it happened after he achieved his goal of getting in and getting out.

If you’re single long enough, you will attempt to have many forms of love or affection work in your favor, even if it’s completely ridiculous in the eyes of others. Men don’t walk into lingerie stores for more than a small gift card unless they’re purchasing something for someone they are having sex with or want to have sex with. So, if a man’s attempting to convince you that he’s purchasing lingerie for his mother, he’s really saying that he’s sleeping with his mother or has intentions of sleeping with his mother, both criminally frowned upon in every part of the world. There is always a time and place for everything and love can come your way at any moment in your life. But with that being said, you’re more than likely to get struck by lighting 60 times before you meet the love of your life while they’re helping their mother with their sex life.

6. Sunday’s are always the best & safest day to get to know someone:

Realizing that Sara wouldn’t be letting her guard down during their first meeting, Hitch immediately devises a plan to grab her attention when she least expects it. The next day, a messenger surprises Sara at work with a walkie-talkie. Using a connected walkie-talkie close by, Hitch uses his charm to ask Sara out on a date. Noticing that she was still a little hesitant, he sweetened the offer by recommending that their date happens on a Sunday, that way it feels more like a casual get-together rather than intimate rendezvous.

Women can tell a lot about a man by how he picks the day to take them out. Monday-Wednesday…..too creepy, Thursday….too eager, Friday & Saturday….an average man with a weird fetish, but if he picks a Sunday, then he’s unlike any other man on the planet. You seriously can’t go wrong impressing someone on a day with so many interesting activities. Your number 1 option should always be Sunday brunch, but it’s also not insane to just take a walk around the city, exercise by taking an early morning hike, jet ski across the Hudson, or have an informative small talk at your favorite coffee house.

5. Be sure to always do your research:

Those who don’t know their history are doomed to repeat it. What made Hitch’s business successful, is the way he obtains unique information on a subject and uses it to his client’s advantage. But when it came to using that same formula to amaze Sara like presenting her with a signature from her great-great grandfather’s on their first date, it always seemed to backfire.

Whether you’re on a first date or in a long-term relationship, women love a man who they can talk to for hours, especially if the entire conversation is about them. The only way you can do that is by getting on google or social media and learning everything you can about her. Also, you have to make sure that you double-check all your facts and information because if you don’t focus long enough, let’s just say that the devil is in the details.

4. Never confess how long it’s been since the last time you’ve gotten laid:

We touched on this subject a bit earlier, but now it’s time we get down to the bras and panties of the matter. While trying to convince Sara that the guy she met at the lingerie store was not a womanizing scumbag, Casey explains why she’s fighting so hard for the story to be true and that’s because she hasn’t had sex in months. Its bad enough that women as beautiful as Casey can’t find a perfect gentleman in all of New York City to sweep them off their feet, but it should be a crime for those same women to have to go months at a time without good sex. Nothing in life is more awkward than having to tell someone when is the last time that you’ve had sex.

Lack of sex affects a person’s decision-making skills in all aspects of dating. If a person is in a relationship or at least is sexually active, they can spot someone flirting with them or eager to cheat on somebody with them from eight miles away. But, if you’re around someone who hasn’t been in a bedroom with anyone other than themselves and a sexual electronic in months or a year, they’re liable to try and convince you that even Thanos’ intentions are justifiable. So be patient and temper your actions with wisdom, because even though it may seem like this phase of your life may never end, nothing lasts forever.

3. Always dance like no one is watching:

The marquee moment arrives when Hitch is explaining to Albert how important dancing is while out with a woman. Already confident in his abilities, Albert demonstrates what he has in store for Allegra that evening, only for Hitch to look at him like he was having a deadly seizure. Later in the film, Hitch would discover that Albert’s dancing confidence would be the reason why Allegra fell in love with him because it helped her feel confident while in the public eye.

No matter if you’re Chris Brown or Lorraine from Seinfeld, you can never fail with your level of dance moves as long as your significant other sees that you’re truly willing to make an effort. You have to be able to find a proper balance on the dance floor, if you’re a great dancer, but your partner not so much, you may have to show some restraint as no one likes a showoff. Now if both of you are horrible dancers, then by all means burn up the dance floor all night long, because everyone will look at you very weirdly, but everyone will also think it’s cute.

*An amazing fun fact, Will Smith was set to executive produce a Hitch TV Series for FX in 2014. A script was written for the pilot episode, but for unknown reasons, the project never advanced past pre-production.

2. Your dream guy/girl has insecurities too:

After being exposed by a misinformed girlfriend along with damaging any chance his best friend had with the woman of his dreams, Hitch decides to make one last effort to make things right by sneaking on Allegra’s boat and begging her to take Albert back. While on the boat, He finds out that even a woman who has it all like Allegra Cole can still have some extreme insecurities and doubts about themselves.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so you may have the opportunity to be with the person you most desire, but there’s a 100% chance that the same person has some unseen personal issues that you have to help them get over. Most of these insecurities come from overthinking and past struggles they’ve managed to overcome throughout their lives. It’s very important that you compliment your loved ones and make an effort to make them feel like the greatest people alive, including at times when they feel far from it.

1. An ex always motivates success:

Those that can’t date….teach. Before Alex Hitchens was a successful love consultant, he was a geeky college student trying to keep his books from falling out of his backpack. This was until he experienced love at first sight in the form of his college girlfriend Cressida. That moment of bliss would not last long as Hitch would discover that the way he felt about her, is the same way she felt for somebody else. This would lead to him becoming the cupid of New York City that helps his fellow man never feel anything like the way he felt on that fateful day.

Will Smith once said “Ain’t no pain like from the opposite sex.” and for good reason, because there’s no worst feeling in the world than seeing someone you’ve imagined spending the rest of your life with, suddenly not a part of your life. During a “Post Break-Up,” people spend most of their time reminiscing and analyzing the entire relationship. The best of times, the worst of times, why didn’t it last forever? and most importantly, where do you go from here? It’s also during this time, where you found new exciting things about yourself, that lead you to thrive personally and professionally. Heartbreak is just a part of life and you’ll never be able to completely get over a significant ex, but you will use that person as the motivation to become the best version of you and you can thank them for that.

*In an unknown deleted scene from the film, Hitch would run into his old girlfriend Cressida in a coffee house years later.

Do you agree with our list?

What are some hilarious life lessons that you’ve learned from Hitch?

Please leave a comment below and discuss with fans some of your likes, dislikes, and fascinating facts that you’ve learned from taking a trip down memory lane. Remember to always laugh at life, because it’s actually pretty funny.